file Musings on Parshas Toldos

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11 months 4 weeks ago #798 by Heshy Berenholz
Musings on Parshas Toldos was created by Heshy Berenholz
Life Lessons

 Harm done to family by parental favoritism. The child inevitably repeats this behavior as an adult
 Damage done to marriage by partners failing to communicate
 Jealousy and envy make one’s life miserable (Eisav enraged at brother’s actions)
 In life, there are often inevitable repercussions for immoral and unethical behavior. “What goes around comes around”
 Parenthood demands that one not despair of or disown a wayward child
 Instead of emulating the successful, many envy them. Throughout history envy stirred hatred of Jews.

Topics Discussed

 Overview
 “And these are the Descendants [lineage] of Yitzchak, the Son of Avraham…
 Family Dynamics
 On Buying the Birthright
 Yitzchak Blesses His Sons
 Why Did Yitzchak Insist on Blessing Eisav?
 Was Yitzchak Really Deceived?
 The Personalities of Yitzchak and Eisav


 Second matriarch who has difficulty conceiving. Drawing attention to the reality that children are a gift from God
 Birth of twins Eisav (named by both parents; name related to thick hair) and Yaakov (named by his father for overreaching, seeming to grab his brother’s heel [Eikev] during birth)
 Eisav is a skilled hunter and outdoorsman who feeds his father Yitzchak
 Yaakov is a simple/innocent/quiet/harmless/perfect child who prefers the indoors
 Yaakov buys the Birthright from Eisav
 Yitzchak…
• Sires twins after twenty years of marriage
• Is warned by God not to travel to Egypt
• Stays in Gerar because of famine
• Prospers in agriculture
• Is evicted by king Avimelech and his envious nation who (falsely) assert that Yitzchak prospered at his nation’s expense. First Jewish expulsion from the Homeland
• Digs new, and re-digs old, closed water wells that the Gerarites allege are theirs
• Swears an oath of non-aggression with Avimelech at the latter’s insistence
• Is embittered by Eisav’s marriage to two Hittite women
• Blesses Yaakov in an incident where (instigated by his mother) Yaakov pretends to be Eisav, the son that Yitzchak summoned to be blessed
• Instructs Yaakov to travel to marry a woman from Rivkah’s family in Padan Aram
• Blesses Yaakov with the Avrahamic promise of a Nation and a Land

“And these are the Descendants [lineage] of Yitzchak, the Son of Avraham…

…Avraham fathered Yitzchak.” Rashi explains that the Torah’s urgency to emphasize by repetition that Avraham sired Yitzchak is because some skeptics questioned Avraham’s fatherhood given that he was one hundred years old when Yitzchak was born. Therefore, the Torah reminds us (them) that Yitzchak’s resemblance to his father stands as testimony to Avraham being the father.

Perhaps, on a deeper level, the Torah makes the point that Yitzchak was very much like his father, but with far less independence. He is no innovator. Instead he is a consolidator and transmitter of the faith. He re-opens the wells of water that his father dug that had been subsequently closed by the surrounding vindictive nations. He is the link that receives the traditions, ethics and beliefs from his father and then transmits them to his son Yaakov.

Family Dynamics

Yitzchak stands by his wife when she is having difficulty conceiving. Ironically, later Yaakov is totally un-empathic when his then-childless wife Rachel pleads with him to pray to God on her behalf to give her children. His angry response to her is “Am I in the place of God who has withheld the fruit of the womb from you?” But Yitzchak prays fervently “l’nochach ishto” which can mean “opposite his wife” [referring to where they stood when they prayed] but can also be translated to mean that during his prayers the image of his wife was uppermost in his thoughts.

Yitzchak prayed “because she [Rivkah] was barren”. It seems that today-- as then-- when a couple can’t conceive it is assumed that the wife is the problem. But it’s possible that Yitzchak was the one with the problem because he was likely traumatized by the experience of having nearly been slaughtered by his father at the Akedah (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). “God accepted his prayer and his wife Rivkah conceived” may mean that he was praying to God about his inability to impregnate his wife—and God listened and healed.

Others see a troubled relationship between husband and wife. Yitzchak prays repeatedly to God in one corner of the room (opposite his wife) for Rivkah to conceive after twenty years of a barren marriage. It appears that they are not pleading together as one but as two individuals opposite one another. Rivkah conceives and goes by herself to inquire why she is experiencing the pains of what appears to be a struggle between the twin fetuses in her womb, as if one is attempting to crush the other. She is told that she will give birth to individuals who will head nations that struggle for domination and leadership, but that the younger one (Yaakov) ultimately will prevail. She seems not to have shared this information with her husband.

Eisav, born first, grows to be a hunter. Yaakov is described as Ish Tam (honest; simple; unassuming; filled with both innocence and integrity) who becomes a tent dweller (as a shepherd; or as a student in Yeshiva; or a stay-at-home). Yitzchak favors Eisav (because he brings him food) and Rivkah favors Yaakov (no reason given).

Yitzchak, who had never received a blessing from his father, marries a mother-substitute. Rivkah marries an older man, a father-figure. Lack of a united front by parents and parental favoritism breed an environment of intense sibling rivalry and potential fratricide. Psychologist Henry Kagan, cited by Rabbi Gunter Plaut, notes that each of the twins was half loved. Yaakov grows up filled with fear because he is insufficiently loved by a feminine father. Eisav, who is insufficiently loved by his masculine mother, grows up filled with hate. It took the “therapy” of life’s hardships for the brothers, after many years of a hateful relationship, to reconcile.

On Buying the Birthright

In ancient times, the first-born male in a family…

 Had a privileged status
 Received a double portion inheritance
 Was given a seat of honor among his brothers
 Was considered quasi-holy with responsibility for religious and ceremonial activities

Either the father, as the head of the clan, or the firstborn himself had the ability to transfer (by gift or by sale) the firstborn status to another child.

One day, Yaakov was boiling a stew. [Professor Everett Foxx notes that the phrasing may connote plotting, “cooking up” to stir up trouble. Was Yaakov being mischievous? Or was he innocently trying to win his father’s heart with food, much as his brother did?] Eisav comes home famished and demands that Yaakov “pour down ‘na’ his gullet” the red stuff that he is cooking. [He cannot even say the word stew and instead points impatiently to the boiling pot of “red stuff”.] “Na” means “please”. But “na” also means “now!” or “uncooked”. Eisav is insisting on immediate gratification; he demands to be fed even if the food is still raw.

Yaakov carefully weighs his words and in a seemingly legalistic manner asks that Eisav first sell the Birthright, holding back the word “to me” until the end of the sentence. Eisav readily agrees, reasoning that “I am at the point of death, so of what use is my birthright to me?” Eisav swears to it and, in a rapid-fire chain of verbs, is fed bread and lentils stew; eats, drinks, and leaves, thereby spurning the Birthright and its historic importance.

Yaakov’s bartering of food for the Birthright seems less-than-appropriate behavior. Some assert that this shows Yaakov’s desperate longing to be the one to carry on the religious heritage of his father and grandfather. Rabbi Dr. J.H. Hertz thinks that Yaakov (correctly) thought that his brother had little regard for the Birthright and, when this opportunity to put him to the test presented itself, he acted to determine what Eisav really thought about the Birthright. [Withholding the food would not have fatal consequences.] Others view the story as a parable of life on how the exceptional person (Yaakov) can outmaneuver a more run-of the-mill person (Eisav).

The Torah does not explicitly tell us whether Yaakov’s conduct was morally justified but implies that it was not. Perhaps it is because of his behavior here and later when he lies to his blind father about his identity, that Yaakov’s life is filled measure for measure (Midah K’neged Midah) with ordeals, with tragedies and with being tricked by others. There are often inevitable repercussions for immoral and unethical behavior. In Yaakov’s case, he will…

• Be deceived by Lavan, who on Yaakov’s wedding night substitutes Leah for Rachel, the woman Yaakov’s deeply loves and thinks he is marrying
• Experience the intense sibling rivalry and murderous wishes of his sons
• Lose Rachel, the wife he loves
• Later in life be inconsolable upon learning about the presumed gory death of his favorite son Yosef
• Spend his last days in a foreign country

Yitzchak Blesses His Sons

“When Yitzchak was old, and his eyes were too dim to see” he calls his older son Eisav to hunt some game, prepare it into a tasty dish and serve it to him so that he may be given a special blessing before he dies. Yitzchak’s weakened sight…
• May have been from old age or
• May mean that he was “blinded” by his love for his son or
• “Too dim to see” means his judgment was impaired or
• May have resulted from the tears of the angels crying during the Akeida (Midrash). The trauma of the Akeida affected his sight and/or his judgment (insight regarding who was the deserving son).

Rivkah, who had been eavesdropping, commands Yaakov to bring two choice kids from the flock that she will prepare for him to bring to his father so that he, and not Eisav, will receive the blessing. She was privy to God’s promise that it was Yaakov-- and not Eisav-- who was destined to continue the nation-building started by Avraham. She was fearful Yitzchak would make the mistake of selecting Eisav. She had no way of knowing that Yitzchak had two types of blessings ready. One was for material wealth and the other for nation-building. It was the former he was planning to give Eisav and not the latter.

A reluctant Yaakov notes that, unlike his hairy brother, he is smooth skinned and fears “ooliye yemushaynee avi— if my father touches me, I will appear like a trickster and bring upon myself a curse, not a blessing”. Yaakov appears to be more concerned about getting caught than he is about deceiving his father.

Rabbi Jacob Mecklenburg (German scholar, 1785-1865 cited by Nechama Leibowitz) points out how the words communicate Yaakov’s reluctance to be a deceiver. Yaakov uses the Hebrew word “ooliye” instead of “pen”. The latter implies that the speaker does not want the event to occur, whereas the former suggests that speaker hopes that the event does happen. Yaakov (feeling guilty?) wants to be found out! His mother Rivkah accepts responsibility and he “went, took and brought” reluctantly carrying out his mother’s command without much enthusiasm. The Midrash adds that he went “under duress, bent and weeping”. His mother even must dress him in his brother’s clothing to complete the charade.

When Yaakov arrives, his father Yitzchak asks, “who are you?” to which Yaakov responds, “I am Eisav your first born…please sit up and eat”. [ Rav Sadya Gaon reasons that because Yaakov had legally purchased the Birthright from his brother, he felt justified in referring to himself as “Eisav your first born”.] Because of Yaakov’s words (i.e., citing the help of God as the reason for his speedy return), Yitzchak is suspicious but then draws Yaakov close and thinks: “Hakol Kol Yaakov v’hayadayim yeday Eisav—the voice is the voice of Yaakov, but the hands are the hands of Eisav”. Yaakov then blesses him with material rewards (V’yetain Lecha Haelokim Meetaal Hashamayim…).

As soon as Yaakov leaves, Eisav arrives and orders his father to sit up and eat. Yitzchak is seized with a violent trembling when he realizes that it was Yaakov whom he blessed earlier. Eisav bursts into a wild, bitter sobbing and pleads to also be given a blessing. Although the Torah typically is limited in its use of emotions, here Eisav’s heart-rending cries leave us with the feeling that he is in fact the injured party, having been cheated out of what was rightfully his. Yitzchak hesitates but ultimately pronounces blessings of material rewards-- the fat of the earth and the dew of the heavens above. Yitzchak also predicts that Eisav and his descendants will “live by the sword”.

Professor Robert Alter notes the literary aspects of this drama:

 The word “blessing” is repeated seven times
 There is reliance on taste, touch and smell for identification
 There are seven interlocking scenes, each containing a two-character dialogue:

When Rivkah learns that Eisav plans to murder Yaakov she urges Yaakov to flee. Yitzchak sends Yaakov to Rivkah’s family in Padan Aram to find a wife. Before he leaves, Yitzchak prays that God grant Yaakov and his descendants the blessings to possess the land that He gave to Avraham.

Rivkah’s aim was to assure her son Yaakov of prosperity, of happiness and of receiving the Avrahamic blessing. But perhaps the lesson here is that the end does not justify the means, and because of her actions her son was forced to flee home like a refugee and escape to a foreign land. Too, it seems that she never saw her beloved son again.

Why Did Yitzchak Insist on Blessing Eisav?

 Yitzchak, who loved both his sons, recognized Eisav for what he was. But, notes Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, “the moral responsibility of parenthood demands that we do not despair of or disown a wayward son.” A parent often needs to pay greater attention to the child who is at risk of turning out badly

 Because he experienced a kind of spiritual blindness (according to Abravanel) that prevented him from perceiving reality

 The Midrash states that at the Akeida, Yitzchak glanced on high and perceived the Divine Presence. One who has “gotten a peek” of the Essential Truthful God is incapable of understanding or accepting falsehood and hypocrisy in the world

 Hayyim Ibn Attar (Moroccan Kabbalist, 1696-1743) in his Torah commentary, Or Hachayyim, explains that Yitzchak wanted to bless Eisav because of his weakness and misconduct, hoping that blessings of bounty would influence Eisav to mend his ways

 Rabbi Menachem Leibtag’s approach focuses on the centrality of the Bechira [selection] process in the Book of Bereshit-- God’s designation of Avraham and his offspring to become His special nation. Since Yaakov and Eisav were born from the same mother, Yitzchak assumed that both were to receive the Divine promise of Land and offspring.

The word bechira stands in contrast to a similar-sounding word, bracha, a father’s personal blessing to each son. God does bechira; a father bestows bracha. Yaakov’s intention was to bestow a bracha on Eisav of prosperity and leadership because Eisav was the family man with children who had a job and took care of others. Yaakov, who was single and living at home, would presumably be blessed by Yitzchak with prosperity and with spiritual leadership later.

Rivkah intervenes because she knows from inquiries during her difficult pregnancy that “There are two nations in your womb and two separate peoples shall issue from your body…and the older shall serve the younger”. It appears that she never shared this knowledge with her husband. Yitzchak assumed that both sons are part of the bechira. Rivkah knew that it could be only Yaakov.

The Netziv thinks that Rivkah’s earlier enveloping herself with a veil when she first catches sight of Yitzchak is characteristic of one who feels unworthy. Because she could not overcome this feeling of inadequacy, she was unable to “talk straight” to her own husband. Instead, she needs to resort to the trickery, something she learned at home as a child.

Rav Hirsch reasons that Rivkah did not want to deceive her husband. She wanted him to discover for himself that it was Yaakov imitating Eisav, thereby driving home the point of how easily Yitzchak could be fooled in his judgment and evaluation of people.

Rivkah has a serious dilemma and only limited time to act. Fearful that Yitzchak intended to give the Avrahamic blessing to the wrong son, she resorts to trickery to ensure that it is Yaakov, who (rightfully) receives it. When the real Eisav arrives, Yitzchak realizes his mistake and, recognizing that Eisav is not suitable to receive the spiritual leadership blessing he saved for Yaakov, grants him a blessing of prosperity and predicts that Eisav can become the leader only if Yaakov’s leadership falters.

Rabbi Leibtag assumes that at some later point Rivkah explained to Yitzchak the reason for her behavior and that it will be only Yaakov who is part of the bechira process. Therefore, when Yaakov leaves for Padan Aram, Yitzchak prays that God grant him--and him alone-- the blessings promised to Avraham of a special Nation inheriting a special Land.

Was Yitzchak Really Deceived?

Rabbi Plaut maintains that on some (unconscious) level Yitzchak was aware of Yaakov’s identity but pretended to be deceived. He wants to be deceived because in his heart he knows that his favorite son Eisav lacks the ability and character to carry on the destiny of Avraham. Being weak and indecisive, he does not have the courage to face his son with the truth. It is only after the meeting with Eisav --when the father trembles and the son weeps bitterly--that Yitzchak can grant Yaakov the blessings promised to Avraham.

Rabbi Sacks offers an alternate approach to understanding the text. Although he favored Eisav, Yitzchak realized that the bechira process would be continued through Yaakov and not through Eisav. Therefore, he prepared two different sets of blessings. Eisav would be granted wealth and power, the things he appreciated and craved. Yaakov would be the recipient of the covenantal blessings that God had promised both Avraham and Yitzchak: children and a homeland. But Rivkah mistakenly believed that material blessings must be associated covenantal blessings.

Rabbi Sacks explains that tragedy resulted despite all four participants in this drama acting appropriately based on their understanding of the situation…
• Eisav acts respectfully to his father.
• Yitzchak prepares to bless him with wealth and power.
• Rivkah was told during her pregnancy that she was carrying twins and that it would the younger one, Yaakov, who would continue the covenant and who would carry Avraham’s mission into the future. She mistakenly fears that her husband would be granting the covenantal blessings to the wrong son.
• Although he has reservations about his mother’s plan, Yaakov goes along reasoning that “she would not have proposed deceit without a strong moral reason for doing so.”

But there was no need for deceit because Yitzchak planned all along to pass along the Avrahamic blessings to Yaakov and the blessings of material wealth to Eisav. It takes twenty-two years-- after he wrestles with an angel-- for Yaakov to realize his mistake. Yaakov then returns to Eisav the accumulated wealth from the blessings that he had wrongly taken from Eisav. At that point the brothers finally reconcile.

The Personalities of Yitzchak and Eisav

Yitzchak was the only Patriarch who…
• Was monogamous
• Never had a name change
• Prayed to God for a child alongside his wife
• Engaged in agriculture—where he was unusually productive and successful
• Never traveled outside the land of Canaan

Rabbi Joseph Telushkin observes that, as a Patriarch, Yitzchak lacked the charisma of Avraham and the shrewdness of Yaakov. The trauma of the near-death Akeida seems to have left him passive:

• He must have a wife selected for him rather than finding one for himself and…
• The woman chosen is a kind of mother substitute
• When the Gerarites contest the water wells he has dug, he chooses to move elsewhere rather than fight to defend his rights

On the other hand, his business and agricultural skills enabled him to become a very wealthy man. His Patriarchal role is to consolidate the ethics and morals of his father and to then pass them on to his offspring.

The Torah describes Eisav’s devotion to his father for whom he hunted wildlife, prepared it and then fed it to him [“Tzayid b’fiv”—he put the food in Yitzchak’s mouth]. Even when he later plans to murder his brother Yaakov, he decides to wait until after his father dies, presumably to avoid inflicting this emotional pain on dad. Rabbi Shimon ben Gamliel asserts that “No man respected his parents more than I. Notwithstanding; I have found that Eisav respected his father more”.

Others view him differently. Targum translates Tzayid B’fiv to mean that he sought out ways to trick his father and ask him questions that would convey his being a stickler for proper behavior (which he was, of course, not). The time he arrived home famished was a day that he was exhausted from committing many murders. A Midrash portrays him as a symbol of Jew-hating. He boasts of having perfected murder. Unlike his predecessors who did not get it right he would murder his brother only after the death of their father to assure that there would never be another sibling to replace him. Then there would be no more Israelites and no nation of Israel, an ancient version of the “Final Solution”.

When he realized that Yaakov had been blessed instead of him Eisav sobs loudly and bitterly (“tz’aka gedola umara”). That similar Hebrew words (“z’aka gedola umara”) are used to describe Mordechai’s expression of pain in the Book of Esther has led some to conclude that the threat of Jewish extinction then was punishment for the pain experienced by Eisav.

Rabbi H. L. Berenholz, C.F.A

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